How to facilitate adaptation...
There is one thing I do not know how to help my new teachers with - adaptation. I do not mean to the schedule or the work or anything, but to the 9,000 emotions and thoughts that you just don't have to deal with when you aren't working in difficult schools.
So, since half of my readers are med students (or really, student), and the other half is my mother, who has a fair amount of memories of me going through the same thing, I decided to put this out there and ask for suggestions.
Here's what I think is the situation.... You come into a school wanting to help, to improve kids' lives and to change things. Then, you start, and you realize that you are human, and you can only do so much. You want to address every problem, nip every bad behavior in the bud, and spend some personal time getting to know every student so they know how insanely deeply you actually care about them and their futures. But you simply can't. Then, you begin to feel guilty because you have chosen some students over the others, wondering if you made the right decision. And eventually... you just feel absolutely drained and confused. How do you choose? How much can you expect from yourself? How much can you really expect from them, coming from the environments that they do? How do you find that balance?
I remember my first year.. crying sooo many times. In fact, I remember watching the news in June and hearing about one of the students from my old school in the Bronx and crying for an hour. Mostly, I cried because I felt like no matter what I did, these students never had a chance... no positive examples, no encouragement... what hope is there? Man I cried that first year. I should have had a water bed.
I remember my friend Linda said during her hopspital work as a pharmacist that someone told her something about that he thinks of it like if the emergency pharmacy team is called in, the patient is basically dead, but if you are able to keep them alive, you have accomplished something. If you lose them, they are the same as they would have been without you. I think you kind of have to think of these kids that way also.
But really... you need to be patient. And I can't just tell them that and have them understand. So many little victories are happening everyday. If the kids aren't cursing, slapping each other, or doing whatever else they normally do outside school, you are already winning because you have broken them from their societal norms of acceptable behaviors. If they are calling you Mr. or Ms, you have a victory, because they are showing respect for an adult. They are all victories, of far greater magnitude than memorizing some formula or applying some rule. Changing lives is not visible, and especially not quantifiable. It isn't until parent teacher conferences, or until the spring when you really start to recognize how much each student is changing. Not in two or three weeks!!!!
Ugh.... but I don't know how to let them know that. Mom... Arzy... any advice?
So, since half of my readers are med students (or really, student), and the other half is my mother, who has a fair amount of memories of me going through the same thing, I decided to put this out there and ask for suggestions.
Here's what I think is the situation.... You come into a school wanting to help, to improve kids' lives and to change things. Then, you start, and you realize that you are human, and you can only do so much. You want to address every problem, nip every bad behavior in the bud, and spend some personal time getting to know every student so they know how insanely deeply you actually care about them and their futures. But you simply can't. Then, you begin to feel guilty because you have chosen some students over the others, wondering if you made the right decision. And eventually... you just feel absolutely drained and confused. How do you choose? How much can you expect from yourself? How much can you really expect from them, coming from the environments that they do? How do you find that balance?
I remember my first year.. crying sooo many times. In fact, I remember watching the news in June and hearing about one of the students from my old school in the Bronx and crying for an hour. Mostly, I cried because I felt like no matter what I did, these students never had a chance... no positive examples, no encouragement... what hope is there? Man I cried that first year. I should have had a water bed.
I remember my friend Linda said during her hopspital work as a pharmacist that someone told her something about that he thinks of it like if the emergency pharmacy team is called in, the patient is basically dead, but if you are able to keep them alive, you have accomplished something. If you lose them, they are the same as they would have been without you. I think you kind of have to think of these kids that way also.
But really... you need to be patient. And I can't just tell them that and have them understand. So many little victories are happening everyday. If the kids aren't cursing, slapping each other, or doing whatever else they normally do outside school, you are already winning because you have broken them from their societal norms of acceptable behaviors. If they are calling you Mr. or Ms, you have a victory, because they are showing respect for an adult. They are all victories, of far greater magnitude than memorizing some formula or applying some rule. Changing lives is not visible, and especially not quantifiable. It isn't until parent teacher conferences, or until the spring when you really start to recognize how much each student is changing. Not in two or three weeks!!!!
Ugh.... but I don't know how to let them know that. Mom... Arzy... any advice?
posted by Jennifer Q @ 4:58 PM
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