Sex Appeal

"You look as good as that candy bar that you're eating. In fact, you look better."

If there is any one aspect of living in New York City that will actually drive me into insanity, it is the constant come ons, one-liners, and sexual look, glares, and stares. Sex permiates every venue that the city has to offer. Flirting is acceptable, and a wink or two here or there can still be flattering, but I am talking about shoved in your face, molested with words while you walk to the store type of a sexual atmosphere.

I have heard many people say this, and I must agree, that New Yorkers have more sex than people in other cities. The average marriage age seems to be 35-40 here, allowing the complete span of the 20's for oats sowing. Until that day of marital bondage, it seems that men, especially those of the old and gross quality, think that any female who dares to walk outside is begging for an obtrusive comment or action. NO!

About a month ago, I was on the subway alone. I was wearing shorts. Not short-shorts, but shorts nonetheless. A greasy man sat down across from me. The car wasn't crowded, but there were a few other people. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed when the man "readjusted" himself, as all girls have often caught some man do. But then he kept "readjusting" to the point where it had been a good ten constant minutes of this action and I was now feeling completely dirty and violated. Did I mention he was staring at me the whole time?

For two weeks after that I didn't leave my apartment except to go to classes and the store. When I did go out, I would dress "frumpy" so as not to attract any attention. Today, I bought a new shirt and a new pair of shoes. I wanted to walk a mile or so in the new heels to see if they will work at all on my Seattle trip, so I wore them to walk to the bookstore. I was eating a candy bar when the above comment was made by a man probably in his mid 40's. And then he just kept walking right next to me. It was the middle of the day, so I wasn't exactly scared, just angry and saddened. Half of me wanted to elbow him hard in the stomach and run off, and the other half just wanted to cry because I am so sick of those things. What really makes a girl start to hate it the most is the fact that I actually just did nothing. I didn't make a belittling comment back, I didn't say "go away"... I just froze, like I always do. Five minutes later I can think of 50 comments to reply with, but at the time... silence. I just kept walking with this man next to me, virtually defenseless against his words, allowing myself to be thought of as a mere object of sex; Allowing a complete stranger to entertain ideas about me as he walked which I did nothing to interrupt.

Something like this always happens right before I leave town to go home. Last year was the worst date ever with the guy who tried to convince me that girls can pee standing up and then laughed at me because I "didn't know that." Yeah... whatever. There may be just as many losers and icky old men per capita in Idaho as there are in New York City, but at least they don't advertise it. Ahh... Idaho....